A little over a year ago I had an article printed in a magazine that I wanted to share with you. It is very fitting for this Christmas season. I pray it blesses you!! Here it is:
I speak from experience when I say that a man’s desire to have children can be strong. Even from childhood, I knew I would be a dad someday, though I had no idea about the road I would travel to get there. At times my desire to have children seemed to outweigh that of my wife. When I discovered that the reasons for “our infertility” were mine, I was crushed beyond words. I petitioned God not to penalize my wife for my shortcomings, ignorantly assuming that I was being punished for something I had done.
Adoption had always been a way we embraced for building our family, though I never assumed we would be walking that road so quickly. Although I wanted to adopt, I still had legitimate concerns: What would it be like to raise a child who was not biologically my own and did not look like me? Would people around us suspect my wife of infidelity? How would I/we handle the stares and/or rumors of others? Despite these questions, nothing overshadowed my desire for a children.
Throughout the years, I have heard numerous sermons and songs, and I have read articles that ponder Mary’s state of mind in preparation for Jesus’ birth. I, too, have pondered these things, but last year’s Christmas was different for me. You see, that is when I became the father of two children, both adopted through Bethany. Our daughter, Halynn, was 4 and our son, Holden, was 9 months old at Christmas time. [they are now 6 and 2]
While it was not the first time I experienced a “First Christmas,” it was the first time I celebrated with my son. Unlike in earlier years, last year I began to ask myself questions like these: What about Joseph? What was he was thinking when the angel appeared to inform him about Mary‘s pregnancy? What emotions did he experience in the months leading to Jesus’ arrival? How heavy was the burden he carried knowing that he would raise the son of God?
The Bible tells us that Joseph was a righteous man and hard worker. We also know he was a man of good character because of how he reacted to Mary’s pregnancy. His concern for her well-being was apparent through his actions. He was within his rights to turn his back on Mary and break his engagement, which would have led to her death by stoning. Joseph’s desire to prevent Mary from experiencing this shame and ultimate death led him to decide to separate quietly before their marriage. This, we know from Scripture, was prior to the appearance of the angel and his message to Joseph.
The road Mary and Joseph traveled afterwards was bumpy, both figuratively and literally. The people in their town must have been fully aware that Joseph and Mary were not married, yet Mary’s pregnancy would have brought stares and judgment. Traveling from Nazareth to Bethlehem to be counted in the census also proved to be bumpy—literally.
I am sharing part of our adoption story to encourage you and to express two important lessons from God’s Word. Sometimes the road of life may lead you in directions you did not expect to travel…or maybe you planned to take that road…just at a different time. The roads you travel may be painful. They may seem like punishment, especially when things do not turn out as you thought they would or should. The truths I express to you are not based on my personal opinions, but on God’s Word.
Lesson #1: We may not understand what God is doing at every turn on our road of life, but we must trust Him.
God has a plan for you and your family, but you must seek that plan by praying for wisdom and guidance. God’s ways and thoughts are higher than yours. You must seek Him, and you will most assuredly find Him. And you must realize that this is not a one-time prayer but a daily one. “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:11-13
Lesson #2: When His desires become our desires, our personal opinions take a back seat to His will, and nothing else matters.
As Christians, we like to jump to the end of the verse below, where it states, “and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Rather, we should “Delight thyself [ourselves] also in the Lord….” When God becomes our delight, an exchange occurs. When we delight ourselves in Him, God’s desires become ours, and they align with His will for us. “Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Psalm 37:4
So, what about Joseph? I imagine He had the same feeling I did the first time I laid my eyes on my daughter and my son—an overwhelming sense of love and pride. He also experienced the very natural desire to protect his child at all costs. The judgmental stares of the previous nine months no longer mattered as Joseph looked upon the face of his son wrapped in swaddling clothes and nestled comfortably in his arms. The fact that Jesus was not Joseph’s biological child no longer mattered. I like to think that the first song Joseph sang to Jesus mirrored the lyrics in “Joseph’s Lullaby” by MercyMe:
“Go to sleep my Son, this manger for your bed. You have a long road before You, rest Your little head. Can You feel the weight of Your glory? Do You understand the price? Or does the Father guard Your heart for now so You can sleep tonight?
Go to sleep my Son. Go and chase Your dreams. This world can wait for one more moment. Go and sleep in peace. I believe the glory of Heaven is lying in my arms tonight. Lord, I ask that He, for just this moment simply be my child.
Go to sleep my Son. Baby, close Your eyes. Soon enough You’ll save the day but for now, dear Child of mine…Oh my Jesus….sleep tight”
Be encouraged and remember this: Regardless of your circumstance, God is in control, and He will never leave nor forsake you.
**If you would like to hear this song….AND IT’S WORTH THE 3 MINUTES IT WILL TAKE YOU TO LISTEN TO IT….you can find it here: http://youtu.be/9ehZ5s_icFE